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The Exorcism of Arny Krueger.
For this momentous event, we have rented a sub-basement below a tatoo
parlor.
Bathed in dim red light, IATSE locals are busy setting up sound and lights.
Above us, filtering through the rotted timbers, are the muffled screams of
the tatooist's clients, who sound like he is driving a staple gun into their
flesh.
It is my understanding, Ladies and Gentlemen, that our Guest of Honor, Arny
Krueger, will arrive here strapped to an ironing board.
As I look about me, I see some guests have already arrived. Hmmm. They are
dressed in black suits, have long beards, and are carrying large knives.
Let's see what they are about.

Good evening, gentlemen. You certainly are early arrivals. You, Sir, what do
you expect to see tonight? You say you're here for the circumcision?!!! I'm
sorry, but this is an exorcism, not a circumcision, so put away those
knives. Yes, I'm sure. One slip with those, and it would be a bloody Mary
indeed. No, we don't discriminate. You want to talk to my lawyer? Well I
want to talk to your lawyer!

I'm sorry about the misunderstanding, Ladies and Gentlemen. I'm sure that
when we test the Mettle of the Devil, there will be plenty of cliffhanger
moments, just like there was with the Rumble in the Jungle, and the Killa in
Manilla. Stick with us, as the situation develops for the latest in
tonight's special event"

THE EXORCISM OF ARNY KRUEGER

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