CHIEF OF LIARS

( to the tune of Gilbert & Sulllivan's "Ruler of the Queen's Navy" from H.M.S.
Pinafore)

When I was sixteen, I went to school
And showed all the little girls my big slide rule
I told them there was even more to see
And all they had to do was follow me

They followed me but got denied
Because they soon found out that I had lied!

Little Girls Chorus:

We followed him but got denied
Because we soon found out that he had lied

Now engineering was my lifelong dream
So I went to college and I hatched a scheme
To fabricate and twist the truth
So I could fool my teachers and the college youth.

College Kids Chorus:

He fabricated and twisted the truth
So he could fool his teachers and the college youth.

I later sold computers that often crashed
The customers were angry and the PC's trashed
For I had discovered how to swindle buyers
I soon became detested as the worst of liars

Unhappy Customers' Chorus:

For he had discovered how to swindle buyers
He soon became detested as the worst of liars

The world of audio was my next quest
I knew my expertise would be the best
To teach the newbies on that RAO
That tubes and vinyl were a waste of dough

I snipped and then butchered what the others wrote
And frequently then ended on a nasty note
I flamed them fearlessly and started fires
To earn my title as the Chief of Liars

RAO Posters' & Lurkers' Chorus:

He flamed them fearlessly and started fires
To earn his title as the Chief of Liars

So if ever you would like to someday match my fame
You have to learn in detail how to play the game
Just fabricate on newsgroups and swindle buyers
And you may someday earn the title, Chief of Liars 1!!

PC Customers & RAO Lurkers/Posters Choir:

So if ever you would like to someday match my fame
You have to learn in detail how to play the game
Just fabricate on newsgroups and swindle buyers
And you may someday earn the title, Chief of Liars !!!