I fear it's true
Yes, Bratzi has me starting to think there just might be something to
this white supremacist thing after all. I mean, I hardly know any Jews
or Blacks or gays or gypsies or other minorities, so what do I really
care what happens to them? And if they lose a few of their rights,
well at least I still have mine. That's all that really matters in the
end, isn't it? I think gays should all be tested for AIDS because
that'll stop it from spreading.
Why do I have "Deutschland Uber Alles" running through my head in an
endless loop? And why does it sound like it's on vinyl?
I wish I had been born in the 1930s so I could have been around for
the war, when a fascist could do something about it. I'll bet that was
really fun.
Why have they never found Hitler's body? It's because he's not dead.
Why haven't they found such an easily-recognizable person in all these
years? Because Der Fuhrer was too smart. He blended right in. I have
it on good authority that he's an Elvis impersonator in Vegas.
I digress. Eva was hot. She was waaaaaaaaay hotter than Ann Coulter. A
killer body and then that pure Aryan dialect. Wow! Eva was really
smart, too. She was smart because back then they posted your grades
right in front of God and everybody. Prior to that, she had been as
dumb as a schnitzel. After seeing her grades, her peers started to
track her scholastic progress and applying positive pressure. If she
didn't perform well, she had to go down on the entire football team.
If she did failed, her parents had to as well. Talk about pressure to
perform well! That's just one more reason that FOOTBALL RULES!
But our beloved Fuhrer performed. No doubt there! I think he's really,
really cool. He's like, one of the neatest guys ever. Did you realize
that without him, there would have been no Autobahn? Then we couldn't
have copied it for our freeways. Can you imagine life without
freeways? I mean, really. So right there he made up for at least one
million Jews, and we haven't even talked about jet engines, the VW
bug, advances in armor and aerial and submarine warfare, and many
other things. I'll bet when the final tally is in, we actually end up
owing him a few more million Jews, and probably a whole passle of
blacks, too!
So there you have it. After hundreds of thousands of words, Bratzi, I
now see, understand and accept your position. White guys rule! I'm
sorry it took me so long to get it.
Here we go, white guys, here we go!
|