Read it and weep... with laughter!
---Original Message---
Today's Neo-Nazis Have No Respect For Tradition
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/57788
By Karl Quandt
January 24, 2007 | Issue 43.04
The other week, I read that the founder of the National Vanguard is in the
clink for having child pornography in his computer. What is going on with
today's white nationalists? Here it is, 2007, and global Aryan supremacy is
no closer to becoming a reality than it was 60 years ago. I lay the blame
squarely on the shoulders of this new generation. These kids today are
making a disgrace of neo-Nazism.
In my day, it wasn't just about mindless hate-we hated because we stood for
something. Namely, tradition, discipline, and self-respect: values that
these low-life punks have no comprehension of whatsoever. We exalted our
glorious forebears, in Germany as well as the United States. But who today
remembers the great American neo-Nazi leaders like George Lincoln Rockwell
or Matt Koehl? Who honors the great heroes and martyrs of the National
Socialist White People's Party?
It's enough to make me ashamed to be a neo-Nazi.
You can't just call yourself the Master Race-you have to act like it, and
hold yourself to a higher standard than those you despise and wish to
exterminate. Have you seen the way these kids dress? Their idea of a
"uniform" is a T-shirt and combat boots. The rural militias are even worse,
with their filthy fatigues and long hair and beer guts. Excuse me, but I
hardly think hillbilly rejects are what our great Führer had in mind when he
dreamed of a world filled with Aryan supermen. I wouldn't even let them in
my front door, let alone conspire with them to blow up a synagogue.
Don't these people have any white pride?
And don't get me started on the whole "skinhead" thing. What idiot came up
with that idea? When everybody's bald, you can't even tell who's blond. Back
in the '70s, we combed our hair neatly, wore starched, pressed brown shirts,
and polished our jackboots until you could use them as mirrors. We always
looked presentable, even when beating up Mexican migrant workers or sending
hate mail to Jewish leaders. And if there was an organizational meeting, by
golly, you showed up for it. If you were given a task, you did it: Those
leaflets didn't pass themselves out.
Of course, that was back when being a neo-Nazi still meant something.
Evidently, the neo-Nazis of today think that all you need to do to keep the
fires of white nationalism burning is to carve a swastika on your chest or
strap an armband around the sleeve of a dingy plaid-flannel shirt.
Breaking bottles, overturning garbage cans, spray-painting racial slurs,
cranking out hour after mind-numbing hour of that ridiculous punk-rock
music-you call that neo-Nazism? When we wanted to relax after a long day of
marching in downtown Skokie, we sang good patriotic German anthems like the
"Horst Wessel Song."
And the way these kids fight! Where's the skill? Sure, in the glory days of
the 1930s, the Nazis doled out their fair share of beatings against the
defenseless. But they did it with a little thing called "class." Watching
these kids throw drunken punches and thrash around like netted trout in
their mosh pits, I'd be shocked if more than three of them could even
goose-step in a straight line. They couldn't make a train run on time if
their lives depended on it, let alone conceive the V-2 rocket or Zyklon B.
I'll tell you one other thing-we weren't parked on our butts typing away on
the Internet all day in some dank room surrounded by empty beer cans. We
were at our remote Montana compounds, enjoying the rugged outdoors. We went
on nature hikes, built huge bonfires, and held daily target practice so we'd
be ready for the coming race war. All these nerds today want to do is make
Web videos decrying the Zionist agenda. That reminds me-if you're going to
appear online, the least you can do is shave. And if you must tattoo an
eagle with an iron cross in its talons across your back, put on a shirt, for
crying out loud. Tattoos aren't anything to brag about. Tattoos are for
inking numbers on the forearms of Jews.
I also hear that when these kids are in prison, they spend their time
sodomizing each other. Why, when we were in prison, we took advantage of our
extra time to write manifestos and memorize The Turner Diaries. Buggery was
the furthest thing from our mind-we saved our essence for propagating the
white race when we got out.
I suppose this new generation will probably call me an old geezer, just
because I still believe in putting on a tie before giving the Hitler salute.
But damn it, if we can't live up to the values that made Nazism great, we
might as well just not have any neo-Nazi movement at all.
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