"TonyP" wrote in message
. net...
William Sommerwerck wrote:

A couple of years ago I was in Toys R Us, standing in the checkout
behind an
elderly gentleman whose grandchild was kicking and screaming because the
toy his
granddad had bought him was not exactly what he wanted. (It was like the
comparable scene in "Babe," only worse.)

I can't tell you how badly I wanted to beat that child. I also wanted to
tongue-lash him and his grandfather, but I kept silent. If adults want
to
indulge their offspring and refuse to discipline them... Well, they'll
suffer
the consequences.

And, that is where we get parental abuse from. My son is 14 and is
trying to test his 'authority' and 'dominance' in the home.
I told him if he wants to be the man and disrespect mother and sister, I
will beat him like a man. Of course, he can swing back. I told him he
could. After using him as a punching bag (body/arm shots only, not hard,
but solid contact), he relented. So, when he gets out of line, I remind
him of what happened and how it will happen again.

I'm surprised how much you guys seem to endorse corporal punishment.
I would like to suggest that you treat it as a last resort. And when you do
use it, consider it as a failure to address issues that should have been
handled with more attention, perhaps beginning a long time ago.

Corporal punishment provides an opportunity for the inattentive parent, who
may not have realized that his child has gone astray, to bring his child
back to the fold at the last minute. But this does not come without cost.
When you use corporal punishment, you're also teaching your child that this
is the way to rear children.

Assuming you have a normal child, it should be possible for you to make him
part of YOUR world. If he feels part of this world, he won't want to go
against it or harm it. Give him constructive values, and you will minimize
the number of occasions where you, the parent, will have to put aside
civilized values to subdue your child.

Quality time with children does not simply involve recreating together. It
involves talking. The parent is the primary giver of moral values. No one
else -- teacher, pastor, or troop leader, can replace this role. Many
parents feel uncomfortable or inadequate doing this. But every day, every
situation you or your child encounter, has learning potential. You can
explain to your child how you handled a situation, and you can listen to
your son explain how he handled his, and give him advice.