Scott Reams' reaction to Apple's Worldwide Developer Conference

[Jerry Barnes]

It was a nice, warm and sunny morning on June 23, 2003, for a young,
bristling Scott Millhouse Reams.

Scott was feeling pretty good about himself and thought, "Finally, this
is the year Scott Reams Water Daws goes from a garage-run, Internet
clone maker into Reams Frozen Daws Inc. listed on NASDAQ!"

For Scott Reams, times were changing. He was the head geek in his home
favorite Sonar newsgroup. He felt loved and needed there. He
single-handedly converted 90% of the group into believing AMD was the
way to go with Sonar.

By selling his AMD machines at Intel prices, Scott was able to pad his
margin on the 50 or so computers he sold.

"I'm just one benchmark away..." Scott would often think, "One benchmark
away from the big time!"

All his other goals realized - making people believe PACE was a company
owned by a poisoned dwarf, conquering RAP's Fletcher with the help of
his Sonar followers and trolls, witnessing the exit of Emagic from the
PC world and the conversion to Sonar of his childhood idol, Ted Perlman.

He was just one benchmark away from securing his summer orders and he
felt the night before he had just achieved it.

"This benchmark here shows that the AMD will be 2% faster, 5% of the
time, when used in conjunction with my water cooling, Windows SP1 and a
Logitech 5 button mouse!"

Scott bristled at the possibilities, "Today the Sonar group, tomorrow
the world!"

Scott turned on his computer that fateful morning and read his email.

"Hmm, a link to Apple's Worldwide Developer Conference. I'll check it
out for a few minutes. That way I can rip on Apple and act like I know
what I'm talking about, " Scott thought to himself.

It wasn't pretty.

Scott learned that a G5 could run over 1000 24 bit stereo voices.
Scott's benchmarks never even came close to that! He also learned that
1600 bands of EQ could be had at only 25% processor usage. Scott's
dreams of Reams Frozen Daws Inc. were crashing before his very eyes.

Click on the link to see a picture of Scott Reams taken on 6/23/03 after
he watched the Apple’s Worldwide Developer Conference:

http://www.thinkbigdesigns.com/justin/Suicide.jpg

[Scott Reams]

Uh... Someone has a sick obsession with me.

I hope you are a hot 19-year-old chick.

-S

[David Morgan \(MAMS\)]

"Scott Reams" > wrote in message ...
> Uh... Someone has a sick obsession with me.
>
> I hope you are a hot 19-year-old chick.


I wouldn't care to know a hot 19 year old chick who would stick
a shotgun in my mouth and pull the trigger. Even if this is Photoshop,
it's a pretty grotesque joke.

--
David Morgan (MAMS)
http://www.m-a-m-s.com
http://www.artisan-recordingstudio.com

[Scott Reams]

Yeah... if I don't seem all that moved by it, it's because this isn't the
first newsgroup in which "Jerry" has attributed this picture to me. It's old
news for me at this point.

What is interesting, however, is this:

http://www.solorb.com/dat-heads/digests/V2.600/D632#Msg4

"Jerry Barnes
Media Tools, Interactive Media Group
Apple Computer, Inc.
(408) 974-7978 "

[Brian Tankersley]

Jerry Barnes wrote:

Mildly amusing until I clicked the link.

Take the link down. Now. Or the crap hits the fan for you in the morning.


Regards,
Brian T

[David Morgan \(MAMS\)]

"Scott Reams" > wrote in message .. .
> Yeah... if I don't seem all that moved by it, it's because this isn't the
> first newsgroup in which "Jerry" has attributed this picture to me. It's old
> news for me at this point.
>
> What is interesting, however, is this:
>
> http://www.solorb.com/dat-heads/digests/V2.600/D632#Msg4
>
> "Jerry Barnes
> Media Tools, Interactive Media Group
> Apple Computer, Inc.
> (408) 974-7978 "
>
>

Posting that here is sufficient payback.

[Nathan West]

Jason you are mindless little ****....one toke over the line...

Jerry Barnes wrote:

> It was a nice, warm and sunny morning on June 23, 2003, for a young,
> bristling Scott Millhouse Reams.

--
Regards,
Nate West

Catapultam habeo.
Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis,
ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.

[Romeo Rondeau]

Don't be silly Dave, only a rookie uses Photoshop :-)

> > I hope you are a hot 19-year-old chick.
>
>
> I wouldn't care to know a hot 19 year old chick who would stick
> a shotgun in my mouth and pull the trigger. Even if this is Photoshop,
> it's a pretty grotesque joke.
>
> --
> David Morgan (MAMS)
> http://www.m-a-m-s.com
> http://www.artisan-recordingstudio.com
>
>

[John L Rice]

"David Morgan (MAMS)" > wrote in message
...
>
> "Scott Reams" > wrote in message
...
> > Uh... Someone has a sick obsession with me.
> >
> > I hope you are a hot 19-year-old chick.
>
>
> I wouldn't care to know a hot 19 year old chick who would stick
> a shotgun in my mouth and pull the trigger. Even if this is Photoshop,
> it's a pretty grotesque joke.
>
> --
> David Morgan (MAMS)
> http://www.m-a-m-s.com
> http://www.artisan-recordingstudio.com
>

Yeah. While psycho chick sex can be some of the best sex, in the long run
it's not worth even just for the mental stress and especially if there is
damage / death involved. Even as a joke I think the picture was in really
poor taste.poor taste.

John L Rice

[Arny Krueger]

"David Morgan (MAMS)" > wrote in message


> "Scott Reams" > wrote in message
> ...

>> Uh... Someone has a sick obsession with me.

>> I hope you are a hot 19-year-old chick.

> I wouldn't care to know a hot 19 year old chick who would stick
> a shotgun in my mouth and pull the trigger. Even if this is
> Photoshop, it's a pretty grotesque joke.

Looks like the work product of one of the usual suspects over at RAO.

[Ted Spencer]

I think it's time to call in The Great GOnzO...


Ted Spencer, NYC

"No amount of classical training will ever teach you what's so cool about
"Tighten Up" by Archie Bell And The Drells" -author unknown

[nuke]

>
>"Scott Reams" > wrote in message
.. .
>> Yeah... if I don't seem all that moved by it, it's because this isn't
>the
>> first newsgroup in which "Jerry" has attributed this picture to me. It's
>old
>> news for me at this point.
>>
>> What is interesting, however, is this:
>>
>> http://www.solorb.com/dat-heads/digests/V2.600/D632#Msg4
>>
>> "Jerry Barnes
>> Media Tools, Interactive Media Group
>> Apple Computer, Inc.
>> (408) 974-xxxx "
>>
>>
>
>Posting that here is sufficient payback.

Except that reference is over 7 years old. It may not even be the same Jerry
Barnes. The original post, though humorous until the link to the image that was
in extremely bad taste, was posted from a Windows system too.

I rather suspect that whoever has that phone extension would be real happy if
no one bothered him.



--
Dr. Nuketopia
Sorry, no e-Mail.
Spam forgeries have resulted in thousands of faked bounces to my address.

[Bill Francis]

It was a pretty 'rookie' move.

--
Bill Francis
Fusion Guitar and Keyboards
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/8/billfrancismusic.htm
"Romeo Rondeau" > wrote in message
...
> Don't be silly Dave, only a rookie uses Photoshop :-)
>
> > > I hope you are a hot 19-year-old chick.
> >
> >
> > I wouldn't care to know a hot 19 year old chick who would stick
> > a shotgun in my mouth and pull the trigger. Even if this is Photoshop,
> > it's a pretty grotesque joke.
> >
> > --
> > David Morgan (MAMS)
> > http://www.m-a-m-s.com
> > http://www.artisan-recordingstudio.com
> >
> >
>
>
>

[Troy]

Professionals use photoshop.....rookies like you do layouts in photoshop and
don't take advice from pros :-)


Romeo Rondeau > wrote in message
...
> Don't be silly Dave, only a rookie uses Photoshop :-)
>
> > > I hope you are a hot 19-year-old chick.
> >
> >
> > I wouldn't care to know a hot 19 year old chick who would stick
> > a shotgun in my mouth and pull the trigger. Even if this is Photoshop,
> > it's a pretty grotesque joke.
> >
> > --
> > David Morgan (MAMS)
> > http://www.m-a-m-s.com
> > http://www.artisan-recordingstudio.com
> >
> >
>
>

[Vladan]

On 2 Jul 2003 09:26:11 GMT, Psy > wrote:

>http://www.thinkbigdesigns.com/justin/Suicide.jpg

Who's in the picture?

Vladan
www.geocities.com/vla_dan_l
www.mp3.com/lesly , www.mp3.com/shook , www.mp3.com/lesly2
www.kunsttick.com/artists/vuskovic/indexdat.htm

[transducr]

Vladan > wrote in message >...
> On 2 Jul 2003 09:26:11 GMT, Psy > wrote:
>
> >http://www.thinkbigdesigns.com/justin/Suicide.jpg
>
> Who's in the picture?
>
> Vladan
> www.geocities.com/vla_dan_l
> www.mp3.com/lesly , www.mp3.com/shook , www.mp3.com/lesly2
> www.kunsttick.com/artists/vuskovic/indexdat.htm

i actually quite enjoy the picture. not necessarily based on it's
content, but based on the color and composition.